*watches the literal most masculine of body-building dudes sashay down the street in stripper heels, lace, and a thong*
….you remember that Thing. that I posted about. Years ago now…. about how cis dudes can just…. do feminine things. and itās read exactly right as a dude performing femininity…. and how itās queering the binary and shit…. you remember that
this is your reminder that I, a transdude, cannot do the thing, because i read asĀ ājust another slut girlā doing the Thing. and that pisses me off.
also way to go telling people to eat less meat who would, actually literally, die without it douchebro~ š
Guys I am sorry that your system is fucked, I really am. Iām sorry that republicans throughout the ages have alternately treated your constitution as sacred and then taken a dump right in the middle of it. I really am.Ā
But you have two choices as I see it from over here in Aussie land where YES I am safe from whatever fucking bullshit Kavanaugh pulls in the supreme court but where EVERY FUCKING THING YOU GUYS DO seems to be a carte blanche for our spineless fucktards of a government to try to one up them in hideousness.Ā
Choice one: Grit your fucking teeth and vote democrat even if you personally hate the fucker.
Choice two: Violently overthrow your government and start from scratch.
As a history teacher, I can see which way this is going. I have a lot of friends over there, a lot of people I love. Please take the first choice.
OH THERE IS A THIRD CHOICE WHICH IS JUST LET YOURSELVES END UP IN A DICTATORSHIP and well considering America has more miltiary might than LITERALLY ANYONE OTHER THAN CHINA guess who gets fucked over if THAT happens? ALL OF YOU. AND THEN ALL OF US.Ā
We are as invested in this as you are. We are powerless. You are not.
Basically, whatās going on right now is that the GOP is trying to push Heidi Heitkamp, democratic senator for North Dakota and first woman to hold the seat in our state, out of her seat by means of voter segregation. Following Kavanaugh being accepted onto the supreme court, sheās been seriously dropping in the polls. Itās been an absolute shitshow here because our state makes or breaks the Republicans gaining control of the senate. Thereās a REALLY good piece on whatās going on here.
I know I have, like, two and a half fellow Fargo natives following me, so Iām gonna stress this: If youāre in North Dakota, your vote carries some serious weight! You donāt even need to go through the registration process, all you have to do is show up to a polling place with a valid ID. Itās that easy!
I still say the most unrealistic part of Harry Potter was that there wasnāt a scene where Hermione found 16 year old Harry in a shopping cart on top of the Astronomy Tower while 16 year old Ron stood by with Colinās camera because if the prophecy says that he has to die via Voldemort then that means nothing else can kill him ergo thereās no way this could possibly go wrongā¦
I donāt even live in Texas but honestly we need politicians like BetoĀ
Whatās so great about Beto?
Doesnāt take any PAC money or big donor money period. Left or right. Wonāt be beholden to big money interests.
Already pledged to support Bernieās Medicare for All bill should he win
Legalization of Marijuana, expunging records of nonviolent drug offenders.
He wouldnāt have voted for Kavanaugh, and he would have voted for the Violence Against Women reauthorization.
Expanding of LGBTQ rights.
Public works projects like extending broadband access to rural areas and funding for the rail project between Dallas-SA-Austin-Houston.
Bringing back and protecting the voting rights act.
Increasing money for the VA.
Finding healthy solutions to immigration and the boarder, just like his home town El Paso a boarder town thatās one of the safest cities in the country
Prison reform, ending for profit prisons.
I lived in Texas since 2011. ANYONE is better than Cruz yo
unrelated to anything Iāve reblogged recently butĀ
damn it Iām questioning my gender again nowĀ
what would it be like to have a straightforward uncomplicated relationship with gender and sexuality? I sure as fuck donāt know. >.<
@travellinglemonworkshopĀ said: you and me both ā¦ itās like, every time I think I have myself figured out, I realize that puzzle piece A could also fit into a different slot if I turn it around a bit ā¦
this particular time for me itās āI saw a thing, and now Iām re-re-re-evaluating whether or not there is a possibility that I might actually be a trans dude because seeing the thing gave me a weird genderfeel that I was not expecting to haveā
I suspect Iām going to again conclude that while I do have someĀ āmaybe Iād rather be a guyā feels sometimes (and sometimes theyāreā¦ significant), actually transitioning would be more trouble than itās worth for me and I would probably not be happier being stuck as a guy than I am being stuck as a girl, I just really wish I had a magic ring that I could put on when I want to have a dick and a beard instead of a pussy and titsā.
YOU AND ME BOTH.Ā (Though, letās be honest here, I would wear the hell out of that damn ring.)
Or hell, even just a ring that acted as a āhave/donāt have boobsā switch.
Honestly if i ever got a genie-wish or a faerie-favor or somethingā¦ shapeshifting powers. Thatās the first thing on my list.
Iād also absolutely take an offer ofĀ āyou can test-drive being male for a week, and then at the end of the week you get to decide what you want to be permanently for the rest of your lifeā because thenā¦ even though my ideal would be to keep the ability to switch when I want toā¦ at least Iād have actual data for comparison on the merits of each on which to base a final decision.
Sometimes I sorta envy people who just know theyāre binary-trans because while they still gotta deal with a lot of aggravating bullshitā¦ at least they haveĀ clarity, ya know? I mean, I realize this might be someĀ āgrass is greenerā nonsense but nonetheless it occurs in my head sometimes.
Even us binary trans sometimes have our issues tho.
Cuz like, Iād take a dick if it were a cisdude dickā¦ but the science isnāt there for me, personally, to be happy with a surgically attached one. (no, not even a transplant.) Especially with all the nerve issues and scarring and whatnot. Justā¦ no thank you.
and sometimes I donāt despise my chest cuz I have awesome sensation and sometimes thatās fun. But likeā¦ on the other handā¦ god what wouldnāt I do to just have some scientist implant my brain and memories into a different body holy SHIT
Like I said, I realize it might be someĀ āgrass is greenerā shit. I donāt envy ALL the crap you guys have to deal with, butā¦ yeah, clarity about WHAT EVEN AM I would beĀ really nice to have.Ā
And I hear ya on the surgical issues. Even at peakĀ āI want a dick and everything that goes with itā Mood Iām still likeĀ ābut Iād want it to be like a cisdude dick tho, not one with nerve issues and all that and also Iām really unsure about what T would do to my voice and also I already hate how much body hair I have and shaving sucks, but then on the other hand Iād probably look amazing with the right kinda beard (and given my general predisposition to being hairier than average for my existing hormone balance I could probably attain a decent one), and also dudely fat distribution and an easier time building muscle sounds Greatā¦ but then also Iād want a broader chest and there is not even any kinda surgery for THATā
āThere is no surgery in the world to give me the extra six inches of height that my brain keeps insisting that Iām supposed to have.ā
Also WORD on the dick issue.Ā Seriously considering trying T when I hit menopause, though ā¦ I mean, at that point, why the hell not?Ā (Iāve been saying for years that I would ROCK a goatee.)
Honestly, though, itās amazingly *positive* for me to hear your perspective, @house-of-crows, because knowing that some binary trans people go through a lot of the same thought-processes and questions and ānope, that doesnāt work for meā feelings about the current state of medical transitions makes me feel ā¦ I dunno, like less of a fake?Ā Less āso broken she canāt even be trans/nb rightā ā¦Ā So thank you, and please forgive my awkwardness, because itās late and I canāt word and also my foot tends to be permanently lodged in my mouth, so ā¦ yeah.
ās all good!Ā
I was originally gonna wait til I hit 40 cuz at that point everythingās going downhill why the fuck not? But then…. the Actual Dysphoria hit. Thankfully….? *hand wiggle* idk,Ā āthankfullyā itās just how Iām perceived and not much to do with how I feel about myself. So the chest needs to go, definitely, lower voice, better face… all that.
But then thereās the weird shit. Like how my brain INSISTS that I need to be at least 5ā²4ā³. Thatās a MANLY height. 5ā²3ā³ is super feminine and how dare I stop growing an inch too soon wtf? Also the leg thing. I just wanna be that gangly-lean dude who wears skinny jeans and goth clothing but my dumb thighs are TOO. BIG. and so are the hips and jfc it just makes me look like an Egg. yikes.
Itās all the little things, for the most part. Like my hairline, and my actually small hands; ring size of 4. yes really; and my painfully high voice. I donāt much care about my lower body, most of the time. There are times when the Want is Real, buuuut… having a giant scar on my arm or leg or someplace is just not worth it. Especially with how messy and time-intensive other sorts of sex can be if youāre the bottom. Iād rather just use the estrogen cream, and keep what Iāve got working as much as possible.
House Of Crows 